If You Can’t Visit, You Can Record Your Voice 

• Record yourself reading a bedtime story, singing or simply talking to your baby (and we promise, no judgement from neonatal staff about your singing voice!).  

• This can be played to your baby as often as they like or need 

• Your baby will recognise and feel comforted to hear your familiar voice 

• Repeatedly hearing your voice will help baby feel sage and will nurture your relationship 

• Siblings can record themselves or help choose favourite stories to share with baby 

• You can check with staff about when is a good time to play the messages 

Kangaroo care: Cuddle, If You Can 

• Cuddling helps nurture your relationship with your baby 

• The neonatal team will be able to help you to learn when and how to cuddle your baby 

• We know that it is really difficult when you are unable to cuddle your baby. If you cannot cuddle, but you are on the unit – use your words to connect and soothe them. You can explain to your baby what is happening – "I am here. I know this is hard. The doctors are going to give you some medicine, then you can snuggle in peace".  

• If you can't be with your baby, cuddle your partner before they leave for the hospital to pass onto your baby and don't forget to get a cuddle back when your partner comes home. We know this is not the same, but cuddles passed on can go a long way.  

• Siblings and grandparents might also like to pass on cuddles and kisses.  

Attunement: Tune Into Them – Be Aware And Responsive 

• Use your voice, tone and expressions to tune into your baby, letting them know you hear them, learning their language and what their different expressions or noises mean and that you are there to help.  

• Your responses will teach them: I am worthy of care and attention and I can trust in others to help when I need it.  

• Allow your baby to sleep – babies need to sleep a lot! 

Getting To Know Each Other's Faces (on the unit and remotely) 

• For term babies – you could print off a black and white photo of you (if you cannot visit) to laminate so your baby can get to know your face.  

• Use FaceTime / Skype / video messages at the cot-side (while respecting others around you, and at your baby's pace).  

• Gaze lovingly at your baby, either in person or via virtual platforms such as FaceTime.  

• Siblings at home might like to send a card or a drawing for their new baby brother or sister.  

Feed How Feels Best For You 

• Feeding can be tricky.  

• Remind yourself that both you and baby are doing your best and have people to help.  

• Trying singing a song that calms you, or focusing in on your breathing, and slowing it down.  

• Smiling and gazing at your baby while you feed in the way that feels best for you, can help you connect.  

Play Something To Your Baby 

Record and play them songs that your family loves (they may remember them from when they were growing in the womb).  

• You can play a recording of your favourite song or a song  

• It could even be the theme tune of a favourite TV show that your baby heard while in the womb  

• You can invite those who can't visit to choose songs to help to help them feel involved and connected and involved 

• Again, you can check with staff when it is a good time to play these to your baby 

Keeping A Journal 

• When children are a little older they love to hear stories about when they were tiny. You might like to keep a personal blog or diary of your journey 

• You might want to write about your baby's progress, what you have learned about being your baby's parent, your baby's likes and dislikes or your interactions with them that day 

• Letting your baby know how much you are thinking about him or her, the progress they are making and how proud you are of them, are all lovely ways to capture memories for your baby later 

• You could even write a letter to your baby which you can share with him/her when they are older 

• Take photos and videos of your baby when you visit, to share with others and to see how your baby has grown 

Drawing On Other Sources Of Support 

Having big feelings while your baby is in the neonatal unit is completely normal. Talk to each other and to those you feel close to.  

• Whether you are n the unit or at home – you are not alone 

• Connect with your friends, family, health visitor, GP, the neonatal team or the neonatal psychologist – we are all here for you 

• Use virtual ways to connect if you can't see people directly (zoom, FaceTime ect). 

• Everybody needs support when they have had a baby and especially when their baby is in neonatal 

• Remember "It takes a village to raise a child".  

Speak To Staff To Get Involved 

Psychological professionals have specialist training in helping families who have a premature or sick baby. We can think with you about what has happened and what is happening, and help you and your family find ways to meet the challenges of being on the unit. The services can offer family members a safe, confidential place to talk about what is happening and how it is affecting them.  

Be Kind To Yourself 

• Speak to the neonatal team about how you would like to be updated about your baby and when, so we can avoid disturbing your precious time with them when you are here 

• Ask the team about how to get involved in your baby's care (as much as you would like/ are able). 

Psychological Support

Psychological professionals have specialist training in helping families who have a premature or sick baby. We can think with you about what has happened and what is happening, and help you and your family find ways to meet the challenges of being on the unit. The services can offer family members a safe, confidential place to talk about what is happening and how it is affecting them.

Occupational therapy 

Occupational therapists are specialists in supporting you and your baby to connect and do the things you need to be doing. They know lots about helping your baby feel calm and about cuddles and helping you to hold your baby. needs review from an OT